Why I hate ‘cry out’ method

Cry out method

Let’s face it when you becoming a parent you can forget about sleep

And it’s not just you but most of the parents. Simply that’s how it works. Even if your baby is good sleeper he will be hungry during the night or he will have a wet nappy or he would like to cuddle. And that’s OK. That’s how little babies are meant to be.

I know, it’s not an easy job. Sleep deprivation can be a real pain. Believe me, I was there. I was crying, praying, begging for more sleep. But nothing works my son was waking up at least two times during the night and it wasn’t easy to put him sleep again.

I wanted to find any solution for my problem so I read some books and went through thousands of websites. I found something called ‘cry out’ method. A lot of people was saying that it’s really working. So I’ve tried it and I hated it immediately. I couldn’t stand my son’s cry so I was crying with him.

Cry out method

If you’ve never heard about that method (cry out or Ferber method) you probably want to know what it is.

So here is a definition:

Cry out method

It involves “baby-training” children to self-soothe by allowing the child to cry for a predetermined amount of time before receiving external comfort.


I’ve decided that I don’t want to punish my son only because he wants to be close to his parents. He felt comfortable with us which wasn’t a surprise. You are a whole world for your child. It’s logical if your baby doesn’t see you he doesn’t feel safe.

Stress hormone

I didn’t want to stress my son only because I wanted to sleep through the night. Maybe I should be more egoistic but I prefer to think about my son. How he feels and what physiological impact will have that kind of training. Even some pediatricians do not recommend this method because leaving babies to cry without comfort causes a rise in a hormone called cortisol, a stress hormone. Prolonged increases in this hormone inhibit brain and emotional development.

Best decision

In the end, we’ve decided that our son eventually will learn by himself how to sleep in his own bed through the night. And that was our best decision. Now he is 19 months old and has no problem with falling asleep without mommy or daddy. We know our son so we knew he is ready for it. And one night after his bath we fed him and left in his cot and he didn’t protest. He falls asleep just like that. Without crying, stress, and tantrums.

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  • Reply Laurence

    My friend is already having a hard time on their sleeping time, because they are new parents. But I think they’re getting there. Maybe they can’t wait too until the babies can learn how to sleep on their own.Thanks for sharing!

    14 January 2018 at 21:05
  • Reply Melody

    I couldn’t even attempt to let my son cry it out until he was 6 months old. And then I only let him cry for a few minutes because it was too hard to hear him crying. I got lucky though because by 7 months he would go to sleep, on his own and sleep through the night. I still can’t stand to hear him cry for more than a few minutes!
    Melody recently posted…How to Help Your Baby Through the Common ColdMy Profile

    14 January 2018 at 21:18
  • Reply Sarah Bailey

    Hands up I’m not a parent, but if I was I don’t think I could leave my child to cry out, I would want to pick them up and comfort them as best as I can.
    Sarah Bailey recently posted…Holiday Must Haves 2018My Profile

    15 January 2018 at 00:39
  • Reply Dee Jackson

    I know it can be difficult to have your son or daughter crying for extending periods of time. I really appreciated this post so much.

    15 January 2018 at 01:18
  • Reply georgia boanoro

    Our son had no troubles with sleeping in his own bed from the beginning, however there were nights and days that involved a lot of crying; sometimes I let him until he calmed down by himself.
    georgia boanoro recently posted…Essie | Winter 2017My Profile

    15 January 2018 at 07:46
  • Reply My Blog Inspires

    I love and appreciate this post ! Thanks for sharing

    15 January 2018 at 17:11
  • Reply Jersey Girl Cooks

    When my kids were very little I could never let them cry for extended periods of time without helping them! I completely understand how difficult it can be when getting your kids to first start sleeping without their parents.
    Jersey Girl Cooks recently posted…Strawberry Avocado Salad with Fresh Mozzarella and Walnuts #SundaySupperMy Profile

    15 January 2018 at 18:01
  • Reply LavandaMichele

    I was never able to leave my child to cry out, I picked them up and comforted them as best as I can.

    15 January 2018 at 23:55
  • Reply Michelle

    I agree. This method was definitely not for us. When my daughter is ready she will sleep on her own!

    16 January 2018 at 02:21
  • Reply Meagan

    My 4th baby is just 2 weeks old and we will not be trying the cry out method for this child either. It is to traumatic for a child to cry themselves to sleep. They lived 9 months being comforted inside of a mother’s womb so why would I not comfort them outside of the womb just so I can sleep. Sleep when baby sleeps

    16 January 2018 at 02:35
  • Reply David Elliott

    It’s always a balance you walk as a parent. I get not wanting to exhaust or scare your child to death. At the same time, I think the child may learn that being upset gets him the attention he wants. So you have to both let go and encourage while at the same time not allow the child to get overly upset.
    David Elliott recently posted…Monday Memorial: Top Ten Martin Luther King Jr. QuotesMy Profile

    16 January 2018 at 19:19
  • Reply Angie

    I was lucky enough my daughter was a sleeper and I never really have to let her cry out for long periods of time. As she started eating more during the day she started sleeping longer periods of time. As soon as she would wake up in the morning I would make sure I would feed her every 2 hours and like this by night time she had enough calories to be able to sleep a good 6 hours and eventually 8. There were a couple of nights when she would wake up after sleeping for two hours and I would let her cry for about 5-10 minutes and she would just go right back to sleep.

    16 January 2018 at 20:51
  • Reply mj

    Our baby is almost 4 months now and she already knew how to sleep on her own too. She knows when its night that she sleeps long at night and naps during the day. Applause to parents who did train their babies with this kind of practice.

    17 January 2018 at 17:07
  • Reply Suzanne Spiegoski

    Getting babies on a proper sleeping routine can be challenging, I can only imagine! Sharing this with friends who are parents!

    17 January 2018 at 18:43
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